I have found that in
life we often spend a lot of time making time for the big things as we focus on
holidays, promotions, new cars and so on and so forth whilst the little things fall
aside in significance. It has come to my attention that this is not a good idea
because the little things are in actual fact the bread and butter of our lives.
The little things get us through whilst we wait for the big things to make their
cumbersome way around the corer. The little things are the sprightly moments which
make up our days and I don’t think that we pay them enough attention.
Case in point: mugs.
I don’t know about you but I drink a fair amount of tea and coffee. I like to
have a couple of nice mugs so that this very regular experience is never a sub
standard one. Tea or coffee drunk out of a nice mug makes this every day particular
somewhat better and upgrades the level of the experience. The same can be said for
meal times; why have a substandard meal when the inclusion of Dill on your eggs
can improve it and make you feel like you’ve had a little treat?
I came to this conclusion
a few years ago when I was overcoming the effects of a very unpleasant depressive
episode. I had been in crisis mode for a little while and I had stopped enjoying
anything and was living mostly on toast and wine. It wasn’t great really and nothing
had much joy in it. As the depressive episode eased away and I started to eat
properly again, I developed a great amount of interest in cooking and using food
to get myself back to good health. It was while I was doing this that I became
aware of my enjoyment in making a cup of tea, using nice bath time products and
ironing my clothes for work. While I was undertaking my on stage role in my depressive
episode I had forgotten that actual living exists, I had simply been existing and
doing the absolute minimum to get me through each day. I started to return to
some semblance of normality and I began to enjoy myself, daily life didn’t feel
like a monotonous road to nowhere anymore. I realised that I liked doing the
food shopping, I liked running out for a pint of milk, I liked waiting for a
bus, and I enjoyed opening the curtains in the morning and then closing them at
night. This curtain ritual meant the start and end of days I was not desperate
to be over, I could actually find them pleasant and this was a new feeling to me.
Life was normal and for the first time in my life I was content with living a
normal, every day life. I was going to university and I had my part time weekend
job, for a time things were very steady and I had a nice and regular flow to my
life.
I have made it clear that I have depression and
sometimes ‘episodes’ occur and it all becomes quite dramatic until it becomes
intolerable and I have to do something about it. I have found that living for
the little things helps to keep these episodes at bay. I spend my time looking forward
to the things I know will happen and I can count on them. Big things will come
along as they always do and when they come along they are lovely, but life is
not a Victoria Sponge. Life is bread and butter and the little things are the jam
which makes the whole thing that little bit sweeter. I think we should all aim
to have lovely jam so that when the Victoria Sponge has been eaten and only the
crumbs are left we still have our jam buttie to fall back on for comfort until the
next big cake makes its way around the corner.
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